Change is terrifyingly exciting, especially life-change. Our live change so much over the years. Most of the time the changes are small or slow and happen over long periods of time so we hardly notice them, but sometimes they are very big and happen very quickly. I think change is a good thing, but it also scares me to no end. I like the box I live in, it's located very snugly in my comfort zone. Occasionally I venture out and actually end up having a massively good time, while other times (far less frequently) I get burned. That's life though, and life is meant to be lived, it's not something from which you should hide. Really, I think this paragraph was just a long-winded way of saying living is a scary venture.
My life is about to drastically change (in a wonderful way). Parks and Rec is ENDING!!! What am I going to do!?!?! Just kidding, although that is a true story and I will undoubtedly bawl like a wee bairn after the final episode airs. I was watching Parks and Rec last night, as it's in its final season each episode has been highlighting how the characters are handling huge changes in their lives - April and Andy are quitting their jobs and moving to D.C. so April can pursue her dream job, Leslie and Ben are moving to D.C. so Ben can run for congress and Leslie can do something that sounds really boring, but is actually important, Donna and her new husband are moving to Seattle, Tom is getting married, Anne already left (she better come back for the last episode), and Garry is retiring. It's really sad to watch them all going separate ways, especially since the actors are legitimately sad the show is ending and they won't be working together all the time, but it's also happy because all the characters are parting ways for good, healthy reasons. They're leaving home to pursue their dreams and find their purposes. It's scary, but exciting. The storyline in this season really speaks to me (wow that sounds dumb) because I'm about to leave home for the final time, I'm starting a new job and creating a home of my very own. It's not like I'll never be home again, I can come home and visit as often as I like, I'll only be thirty minutes away, but it won't be my home-base anymore, I won't live there, and that is sad to me. I think it's okay to be sad as long as I don't let it consume me or act out in it, but I really would rather just not be sad.
Music Break!
"Holding On and Letting Go" - Ross Copperman
I'm a homebody, this is no huge secret, I love being home because it's where I feel safe and secure regardless of what's going on in the world. Home truly is where the heart is because it's the place we feel loved. Fortunately for me, my new residence is at my place of work, and my coworkers function like a family. I am very blessed to have found the job I have. While I may be sad and a little nervous, I am still very excited to set out on this adventure. There is a saying that life begins at the end of our comfort zone, I think my life is about to start anew.
Change is a good thing because it provides us with an opportunity for growth. When we are challenged we have two options, we can either rise to the occasion and overcome, or we can back away and stay put. Challenges are the deciding factor in our lives, how we respond to them determines how we will live. My faith plays a big role in my decision making. I was so stressed about finding a job and not knowing what the future would hold for the longest time (most of last year). I didn't know if I had made the right choice about my major at school and was feeling pretty out of control and hopeless. My mantra for the longest time was "What am I going to do with my life." I had no idea, I knew I wanted to help people and loved working with horses (and wanted a dog). After I realized I had pretty much no control over the career situation I decided to give it up to God. I have major trust issues, so trusting God was nigh impossible, but I spent a lot of time reading the Bible, praying, and just putting myself out in the job world in hopes that something would work out, thus "Hopefully something will work out," became my new mantra. The more time I spent with God, the more I realized that He truly does love me and is working good things in my life; my mantra changed to "Something will work out." Once I completely gave my life up to God, asking Him what He wanted to do with my life, lots of things started popping up which was almost as stressful as having no options. I didn't know what He wanted me to do so I sought council with trusted friends; I learned that God gives us options in our life that are equally pleasing to Him and allows us to choose our own path and make our own mistakes. We have free will, we do get to make decisions for ourselves, and we get to live with the consequences of our actions. I have chosen to commit my life and my work to God for Proverbs 16:3 says "Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and he will establish your plans." In surrendering to God, I have found peace. I was so stressed out trying to figure out on my own what I should do and trying to control my life. I finally realized I wasn't in control of what happens in my life, and that's a wonderful thing. I don't want that control, I hate making decisions, I would rather have a loving guide give me direction. As soon as I gave God the control and asked for His help, I got direction, and through lots of prayer, I made a decision.
My life is moving quickly and though I'm a little scared, I'm moving forward with it, trusting God to care for me.
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