I was listening to this song earlier/singingalongverypassionately, but that's beside the point and I started really paying attention to the lyrics (which actually make a really good point).
Lyrics go like this:
Could you love somebody like that? Could you attract someone like that? Could you go where people can see someone like me? Could you do that? Would you face me? Make me listen to the truth even if it breaks me? You can judge me, love me If you're hating me, do it honestly All I see are stepford-like lives Needles and knives, beautiful lies Bringing out the green in your eyes Perfect disguise for envy and pride Face me Make me listen to the truth even if it breaks me You can Judge me, love me If you're hating me, do it honestly You can tell, you can tell me, you can tell me, you can tell me, you can tell me Face me Make me listen to the truth even if it breaks me You can judge me, love me If you're hating me… Would you face me? Make me listen to the truth even if it breaks me Judge me, love me If you're hating me, do it honestly You can tell me, you can tell me, you can tell me, you can tell me, you can tell me Do it Honestly
Point being: if you're in any sort of relationship (friendship/family/romantic/whatever) it is better to stay honest and put everything out there honestly rather than keep it inside until it builds and eventually boils over hurting everyone involved.
Let's face it, often times the truth hurts, but we would rather hear the truth right away than let a person stew over it, talk behind your back about it to others, and build it up in their head until it's something much worse than what it started out.
Honesty is hard, it SUCKS to hurt people's feelings and it SUCKS to feel hurt. But more often than not it's what needs to happen. We are doing a greater injury when we are not honest with each other.
This is one of those "stupid things girls do" (I am soooo incredibly guilty of this it's not even funny), we are so afraid of hurting people with our honesty that we find ways around it. This is where every single break-up cliche in the history of the world came from ("it's not you, it's me..." "I need some time to be alone and think..." "We can still be friends..." "etc."). Girls don't like not being liked, we don't like it when people are mad at us that's why we say these things, but we don't realize it would be easier on the guy if we would just say "This is why I don't want to be with you...let's break up." You could probably have avoided the break-up in the first place if you were just honest with him the entire time and told him right away when something hurt/bothered you so you could work it out together (and if he couldn't handle your honesty and broke up with you right then and there then he wasn't worth your time anyway and you just saved a few months of your life).
This doesn't just apply to break-ups though, it applies to friendships as well. If you are honest with your friends all of the time (and they are honest with you) you will hopefully never grow to resent them or have reason to hold a grudge. Otherwise little things build, drama happens, huge fight goes down, and you don't speak for 3 weeks/months/years. With this though, you have to have an understanding that you want your friends to be honest with you and you want to be honest with them. It's no lie, some people can't handle the truth and would rather just obliviously frolic through life until one day adult-hood slaps them in the face. I try to avoid these people because they piss me off, you can decide how you handle them.
Finally, roommates - same thing. Be honest or stuff's going to build up and you're going to HATE each other which sucks because you have to live together. Also, in college, unless you or your roommate has some major issue with it, you will eventually be comfortable enough to change in your room, get this over with on the first day so you don't have that awkward first week or month or whatever. Simply say: "I don't care if you or change in here, do you have any objections?" or something similar. Way less awkward.
Closing - if you haven't gotten my point by now I don't think you're going to so you can stop reading now.
*Disclaimer* - I am a huge hypocrite because I do these things too, if you wanna judge me leave a comment, if not feel free to comment anyway.
Also, I don't know why the bottom part of this post is white and I don't care enough to fix it ;)
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